The Gatherings

I heard several news this month on the passing on of some classmates back in high school and college. It reminded me of our mortality and how short life is and how we need to live it fully.

I rarely meet up with colleagues for reunions. It's not that I don't like reunions nor the company. It's because I don't have the time for it or that it conflicts with several of my already piled up appointments for the day.

This December, however, I did take the time to clear some of my calendars to accommodate two reunions.

The first was with some of my batch mates in my college days. We belonged to the class of 1979 for Bachelor of Science major in Mathematics at the College of Science at UST. We were a handful of mathematics majors. Truth be told, we were the best the college ever produced! Most of us are successful by industry standards and well, we've tried to make the most of our lives. While we're still all alive and well, some of us are doting grandparents already! Even if only a bunch of us were able to come to the reunion, hosted by the ever gracious Gigi Bautista-Rapadas (her dad Mr. Felix Bautista was an icon to recon with and I am truly honored to have been under his wings during our Varsitarian days) at her home. Myrna, who I missed during my trip to New York last October but flew in to Manila this month came to the reunion. Husband and wife Benjie and Beth Tan had come straight from work. Agnes took the time to be with us in spite of the distance traveled as well. I cut my clinic short that day, took the time to laugh, catch up with our life stories and uhmmmmm....make that special appearance with classmates from the past who never seemed to have aged a single day (okay so I exaggerated here a bit, but you've got to hand the fact that we all looked great). After 32 years, this was the first time I graced our reunion. And I enjoyed it!

A week ago, some of my co-residents during our residency training in Pediatrics at the UST Hospital had flown in from the US. Again, I missed the chance to be with them during my trip to Boston and New York two months because of "conflicts in schedule". I received a phone call from Gigi that Meg and Babes were going to be in town and could I join them for lunch? Because Gigi called me 2-3 days before the said event, I stared at my iPhone calendar in disbelief at the very short notice. I told her I'd get back immediately. At the mall that afternoon, I had bumped into Connie Paulino and told her of the "gathering". Connie was quick to affirm that she would attend. Period. Where, when and what time were the only questions she asked. Wow! If Connie could clear her calendar, then so could I. I told my secretaries to clear the Monday for me. Never mind if I had to reschedule some meetings but I was having lunch with my friends. At Chef Jessie at the Rockwell Towers, the five of us had huddled like we always did during our residency days. We told stories, swapped lives, looked back at how life during our training days were, talked about sex or the lack of it (LOL!!!) and yes, enjoyed the short time we could with one another.

That evening I had to cut my clinic short as well to go our Christmas Party for the Department of Pediatrics of Asian Hospital. Held at the Ayala Alabang Country Club and organized by my co-chair Bettina, the party (over pasta and pizza) turned out to be a lot of fun, with many of us letting our hair (or whatever is left of it) down and just simply having fun - like children,
once again!

In all the gatherings I attended, the thought that perhaps this would be someone's last get together dawned on me. We are, after all, not getting any younger. And somehow, the people in our past who are still with us today have taken our journey together. Our paths will cross, no matter how near or far, how long you've not seen each other, how well we've done (or not) in our careers, relationships and love life...and we need to be remembered somehow and we need to stay in touch to some degree.

It took these gatherings to remind me how good life has been and how precious friends are. Here's to all my friends out there! Cheers to life!

Over dimsum, peking duck and friends

I scrambled to erase all existing appointments for my friends. You see, I've not seen many of them in gazillion years. They were my co-residents during residency training in Pediatrics at the UST Hospital and they have come home to celebrate their silver jubilee.

And while they were preparing and excited to see their former classmates and enjoy some bonding time, they found some time to squeeze me in their hectic schedule.

Excited and giddy as I was, I was able to meet most of them during their short stay in Manila (as majority of them are now based in the US).

It was lunch at the Shang Palace at the Makati Shangri-La. Over dimsum, Peking duck and some delectable soup, we shared stories and reminisced those days when we were still young, carefree and yup...crazy.

Stories on life during residency training, admitting conferences with Dr. Eus Rigor, our consultants whom we feared and whom we loved, the loves and tragedies during the training years, the co-residents whom we despised, the scandals, the breakfasts we all shared each day after the admitting conferences when I was chief resident.

Stories on where they are today. Some had married while some, true to being a pediatrician remained - all the single ladies.

The 2 1/2 hours of tete-a-tete wasn't enough but we closed the restaurant and had to part ways and while it was the last I saw of them during their stay in Manila, they will remain one of the best part of my life.

They say that the people you meet along the journey of life completes your life story.

They complete mine.

Reunions in two acts in San Francisco

The American Academy of Pediatrics National Conference and Exhibition meeting in San Francisco was the agenda for my trip to San Francisco this October.

In between the meetings I spared all the rest of my time bonding with friends who had migrated to the Bay City. I stretched my stay an extra 2 days and in between their very busy schedule, I appreciated the fact that they too, took an extra 2 days off just to be with me.

I will not blog about the conference, as it would not interest my readers on what did and what did not go on in the meeting. It was, however, a good meeting considering the fact that the last AAP meeting I had attended was over 6 years ago. This was a reunion for my continuing medical education.

I had missed the wedding of my goddaughter in Manila last year. With my sister suddenly being in the hospital and all, I had sorely missed the day she said “I do”. She, her husband are based in San Francisco. Malu had flown there a few months ago to take care of her when she gave birth. Maggie who is now 2 months old was a joy to behold. Aside from the fact that she reminds me that I am now much older, I have come full circle in my medical career. My goddaughter had grown up with me and she is now a mother as well. How time flies. Malu, my kumare, looked contented and peaceful. Her giggles, laughs, stories and pride could not be contained.

I have always believed that life is like a play. It is made up of two acts – the first act is one of achievement. That is the easiest role to play. We try to find ourselves in the first act. How we play our role in Act I prepares the storyline for the next act.
The second and last act is one of depth. It is the most difficult because this story builds on the first act. Our roles are more challenging because we need to sustain the role we played in Act I. It creates the epitaph of the life we have lived. And there is no rewind here. No retake. One final performance before curtain time.

I think Malu has found her final act. Her contentment. She has finally find home, in San Francisco.

My other friends were with me during the various days. Jojo, Francis and Roland had relocated to San Francisco varying from several decades to several years ago. Each with their own stories to tell. Each had a reason for turning over a new leaf or finding himself or herself in San Francisco. Each finding a place where they could move on.

Perhaps like many of our countrymen who find a place to start over again or begin a new chapter in their lives, San Francisco has provided as a haven for my friends in some way or another.

During the few days I was there, we talked about old times. We dug up memories from our closets, we reminisced on our growing up years. Friendship bonds built over three decades drew moments where I became misty eyed. I had to put on my sunglasses or turn my back on them so they could not see how emotional it got to be.

We shared stories at where life has led us. The bitter pills we had to swallow. The road less traveled. The people who were part of our lives. Those we left behind. The people who are now part of our lives. The pains, the joys, the successes, the failures. The lives we shared that intertwined with our lives.

Between the laughter and the stories we shared I could not help but wonder where life would eventually lead us. I missed those days where I could have friends to turn to at every tragic event or run to when problems are too difficult to handle. I missed those times that I needed a friend to talk to or console me when I’m feeling down and out. I miss the days when I would not have to be accountable for my misdeeds or would get a pat in the back with my accomplishments.

I missed being free and being me.

On the way home from Stanford on the last day, we talked about where life would bring us next.

It was towards the end of the fall season in the US. And like the seasons in our lives, we are in the fall season. We watch the younger ones grow up within our midst and sometimes envy the youthful decadence and radiance we once had.
It is reunions like these that remind us why friends will always be a reason for appreciating the changing seasons in our lives.

And I will always be grateful that somewhere in our lives, our paths had crossed and intertwined.

It is the final act in the stories of our lives.

Wherever life will lead us now, I know that our paths will meet again. Because there was depth in this final act.